What women do in public

surprises me.

Even when I was in my teens, you could see others ( teenagers) make-up on the bus and subway, but nowadays even grown women do it. They even pluck their eyebrows. You wait with horror for them to start pulling out the nose hairs too. Everything happens with intense frenzy and they have everything with them ( probably only a quarter) makeup bag. One can sit and observe their transformation or desire for transformation in detail, without them seeming in the slightest to notice that there is an environment there. In a sense, there is no environment, because basically everyone is looking down at their mobiles. Everyone is in their own bubble.

Sometimes aunties sit and do manicures. They happily file their nails inwardly. They puff away their nail deposits in the form of fine flour away from them, towards others, that is, their fellow passengers. It can be aunties who look the most record-breaking. That really surprises me. One day you will probably see your fellow passengers take the opportunity to take a foot bath between their stations, why not, where is the line? They also spray their hair. Spray spray spray.

But the most common thing that women do in public is clean their hair. With slow movements, they run their fingers through the hair, brushing off the loose hair that gets stuck, straight out into the public hallway, or at the seat next to you. Elegant bouncing movements, with a bit of distaste.

My aversion to this private behavior has nothing to do with age, which one might believe. I have always been appalled by people's self-centered behavior in places we share. I don't understand it. But everything has perhaps loosened up even more since we started talking widely about our private affairs in public places. A friend overheard a mother venting about her son and his private concerns. An entire subway car got an insight into the son's very personal problems. Strangely enough, many people don't seem to trust the technology and turn up their conversational voice a few notches extra so that everyone can participate. It is completely incomprehensible. Embarassing. And how can a mother leave her son like that. Ja, that happens all the time. People leave family, colleges, partners, barn, themselves continuously with no idea who is listening.

One day when I came walking, wearing winter overalls and in the company of snow-soaked dogs with icicles in their beards, I met a man who said:

”Excuse, does the lady know what time it is?”

Then I remembered the big concept ” artighet”. And the value of it. That politeness is about respect and consideration – i grunden. The reason why politeness is important to maintain is in any case to protect these values ​​in practice: respect for others and consideration, deference.

It doesn't work automatically, it must be taught. The one who can't, lose in the long run. It's a skill, a condition and it is a good service to teach it to one's children.

It was very nice to be treated politely. Although it seems like a pettiness, it is an absolute way not to arouse anger, bitterness, irritation. It is a flexible way of dealing with fellow human beings, and spread relief, calmness and balance around him. Since politeness is quite uncommon, it even brings joy to some.

Politeness can lead very wrong. Being a polite girl can be downright life-threatening in certain situations. When the demand for politeness confuses the inner compass and integrity. But usually it is about undramatic episodes.

I think Swedes in general have been a pretty rude people. And it doesn't seem to be getting any better.

Cleaning your hair in public places is … obnoxious. Faktiskt. Not as disgusting as cutting your nails in public. But the step is not far. I don't want to be other people's background like that. Forced to listen to their talk, watch their makeup in progress, get their hair and nail polish on me. It is strange, many are so sickly aware of how they act and speak and look, yet it is so easy for them to deal with hygiene in public and expose their privacy and that of others.

But of course, most others sit in their own bubbles, absorbed in their mobile phones and notice nothing of what is happening around them. I do not. I look around. I guess I'll just end it. Sucked into the mobile's all alternative places for my consciousness to reside. Stop being in the moment. Like so many others.